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looking for some hot stuff
12/06/2005 = 03:00 PM

Quotation of the Week:

Bucky: Hello, Nerdstar? I've locked myself out of my cool.
— Get Fuzzy by Darby Conley

I am sufficiently nerd not only to have sprung for a full year of Nerdstar service, but immediately to have lost my PIN, thereby locking myself out of my cool permanently.

Elbow, and send.

Totally scored some hot sauce just by knowing What the Heck this was.

If you like man-cookery and are as pissed off as I am about the spammy creepazoids who have chased Alton Brown off the blogosphere, go visit Men in Aprons for some testosterone-laden food talk. There's also a podcast.

Speaking of food, and testosterone, I don't know everything I'm getting for Cristkwaanzukahsticestivuseid, but I do know that That Man of Mine brought home something extremely heavy and said, "No peeking," shortly after having witnessed me sighing over a deep cast iron skillet and saying, "I want it, but I don't need it."

(Stay tuned for homemade fried chicken done properly — with the brown bits on the bottom — after the holidays.)

Speaking of food, but not testosterone ...

... Bitches, please. Thanksgiving has been over for weeks. If you're not finished with the turkey yet, may I recommend that you make chili from it? 'Cos if you're even a quarter as sick of eating it as I am of smelling it in the office, the cumin and peppers will be a welcome change, and you won't be wasting any of it. Just use your regular chili recipe and substitute diced turkey for whatever meat you normally use. If you have too much, make a double batch and freeze some. If you don't have enough, add extra beans or even be daring and slice in some chorizo. Just, come on. Enough with the sage already. My olfactories are ready to start laying off workers.

Dear Andrew:

If I provide customer support to a Supergold Member, do I get a cut of the annual fee you charged her, or does she get a discount on the annual fee she pays you for the support you do not provide?

I'm guessing the answer is "Neither of the Above, Because I'm Going to Ignore This Question, Which Is What I Always Do."

Oh, Andrew, how your reputation precedes your nonhelpful self.

Sincerely,

Golf "Where the Hell Is All the Money Going, If Not Toward Better Service for Your Users?" Widow

Thank you to everyone who has participated in the Make Up My Fictional Bio meme. I like it so much that I've replaced my actual truthful bio with the bullshit you guys wrote. If anyone else has a fake memory about me, let me know and I'll add it. You can read the "bio" here or by clicking the silly walking link.

Pick a Microorganism.

Notice how, unlike Pokémon, no one seems to be in any sort of rush in terms of "Gotta get 'em all."

On the other hand, I rather want one of these, just so I can say, "He" (or she) "gave me the clap for Christmas; want to see?"

I confess — I am thirty-mumble years old and I hugged the stuffed Aslan at Barnes and Noble. I think it was more demeaning for him than for me.

I have jumped on the map bandwagon, because I am a sheep like that. Come play.

http://www.frappr.com/visitorstogolfwidow

drinking: strawberry fruit₂o
listening to: Techno Squirrels, Mute
holiday wish: that there won't be any more of this