<< prev = comments [12] = pings [0] = next >>


underbritches falling down
05/31/2006 = 05:25 PM

From now on, when someone pisses me off, not only am I going to picture them in their underwear, I am going to describe what I imagine their underwear is like, both for your amusement and for the soothing of my soul.

Let's try it.

Person: You didn't do [fill in the blank] before you left for vacation.
Me: (aloud) I know. I asked you three times in the two weeks previous, to [insert part that had to be done by them before I could proceed] before Wednesday, which was going to be my last day of work before vacation, but you never replied. (in my head) And you have a big hole in the crotch of your tighty-whities, so ew.

That is soothing. Let's do it again.

Person: (via email) In the planning meetings the group decided the best place for everything. If we start moving things to the front page, it will lose it's ease of navigation.
Me: (via email) I agree, which is why I told [requester] to contact me directly, so I could either help him to locate the existing components, to discuss with him why the existing components are not already located on the front page, or to determine what ought to be on the front page and discuss it with the group. (in my head) Also, I'm amused by your expensive business suit covering up your cheap red satin thong. You may think of yourself as still waters running deep, but we already know you're a pig on the basis of your stank-ass cologne. And you spelled "its" wrong.

Yee hah. Once more, with feeling.

Circumcellion commenter: Your blog sucks.
Me: *DELETE* (in my head) Yes, but my undies are freshly laundered. What's your Mutant Power, X-hole? Graybritches? Or Brownbutt?

Maybe it's only satisfying to me. Guess what? I don't care. Go piss me off. I'll tell everyone what kind of underwear I picture you in. And it will not be pretty.

Tags: underwear, charity, golf, Hanahoe Children's Clinic

It's that time of year again ...

CLICK!

If you donate to That Man's Paypal, he'll know who you are and tell me to put you on this year's shirt, but if you donate directly to the United Way or mail your donation directly to the clinic, I have no way of knowing what a nice thing you did unless you tell me. So note me or comment me and I'll add your name to the Shirt of Much Tackiness.

Here are my latest heroes:

Art
Boxx (locked - but ask her for a password)
Bud Buckley
Cabin-Boy
captive firefly (locked - but it couldn't hurt to ask)
Cosmic
Creamsicle
Dixie
fuzzy-grey
HEIDI!!
Michael Manning
sallydallydo
trishtastic
warcrygirl

Click here to see the 2005 shirt

drinking: rockstar energy beverage fizzy-lifting drink
listening to: that friggin' leekspin site
reminded of: victor borge, "negi-negi"