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i know
07/10/2010 = 03:14 PM

I finally have an entire day off work.

Which is my cue to ponder such questions as: Do courtesans talk about office work when they are on a break?

I know.

I'm also trying to decide if it's worth it to spoil my dinner with chips when I am fully aware, being the one who is preparing said dinner, that we are having steak, fresh green beans, and home fries.

Again, I know. But it's hours till dinner, and the chips are so good.

I don't understand why people are afraid of Sam Rockwell. I saw The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Zooey Deschanel and John Malkovich owned the hell out of him.

I know. But if you want to be afraid of someone, be afraid of the people who thought Canned Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches were a pretty neat idea.

Oh, if only I were kidding. http://markonefoods.com/

On the other hand, the person or persons who invented the Otter Pop might not be brilliant, but in 105° Fahrenheit weather, Otter Pops are bomb.

To my bleedy partners-in-genetics: Otter Pops also help you stop a nosebleed pretty quickly. Eating them, I mean. Not inserting them nasally. (Not sure they'd fit and don't care to try.)

To everyone else: No otters are harmed in the preparation of Otter Pops.

I know. Gourd, I need a vacation.

Oh, new sandwich favorite. You have to do it yourself, but it's easy.

• Two slices of rye bread, each spread with mustard on one side.
• Fill with sliced pastrami, Swiss cheese, and thinly-sliced red onion (raw).
• Grill (actually, griddle) on stovetop, in butter, till golden brown and delicious.

This is called the Shep, after Juma's dad, who invented it.

I did add sliced kosher dills to half of one yesterday, and decided it's a keeper. This is still the Shep, but Golfwidow-style.

Last night, my office lead introduced me to saki ika, which is dried cuttlefish. 'Cos he's all Hawaiian like dat.

I liked it. The texture is like jerky, the flavor is like seafood.

However, one must wash one's hands immediately after consumption, or the cats will follow you home.

Also, if one is a Monty Python fan, one must restrain oneself from hollering, "HELLO, POLLY PARROT! I'VE GOT A NICE CUTTLEFISH FOR YOU WHEN YOU WAKE UP, POLLY PARROT!"

Or maybe that's just me.

Yes, I'm working on the sequel to Getting My Think On. Start your penny jar now and you should have enough to pay for it when I get time to finish it.

I do not care about the World Cup.

I do not care about Mel Gibson.

However, if someone were to shove a vuvuzela up Mel Gibson's racist, prejudiced, misogynistic arse, I'd bake them cookies.

If they shoved it in bell-first, I'd make chocolate chip.

That is all. Move along.

Tags: random

drinking: cascade ice water, sparkling strawberry guava
listening to: Giuffria, Call to the Heart
finally found: a local market that stocks peppadews. frabjous day.