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weakly
08/15/2010 = 10:27 AM

Our trees at work are gettin' shook.

I know; in proper English it should be "shaken," but I was going for the assonance. "Shook" just sounds better.

I hope I have distracted you from the shaken trees. I do not want to write about work, except to point out that the tree-shaking is merely an annoyance at this point and will not, to my knowledge, affect either our business or my job security in the slightest.

The previous non-news was brought to you by the girl who didn't really quit a job via whiteboard, and the flight attendant who became some sort of cult hero because one jerkwad customer sufficiently pissed him off that he threw away a twenty-year career, in this economy, but now he wants his job back.

Unfortunately, there's not much else on my mind.

In the news I see one tiny person with burned facial skin received a face transplant, thank gourd, but the big story is not that; it is that another tiny person with burned facial skin thinks she is too pretty for jail, and wants to copyright her nickname, but can't, because she might be confused with Snooky the perfectly innocent and unobnoxious cartoon cat.

Also, some people were killed at one of those off-road truck races. I have sort of the same feeling I had when those people were killed in the concert hall fire during that show in Rhode Island a few years back — if they'd had better taste in entertainment, they'd still be alive and they'd have saved the cover charges.

Then, of course, I have guilt, because who am I to pick on other people's entertainment choices? I mean, if I get blown up at a movie theater whilst watching Good Omens (no, they still haven't made it into a film; I'm waiting, though), I'll have died doing something I enjoy, so I've no room to talk at all.

Oh, by the way, Tila Tequila? When a crowd doesn't like you and they throw rotten vegetables, it's a hint. When they throw rocks and bottles, it's not a hint. They are not saying, "Please reconsider this performance," they are saying, "We want to injure you." Go away.

You could take Justin Bieber and any stray Kardashians with you, but that's just my personal opinion.

Which of course leads me to the concept that I think I've just figured out the difference between stardom and celebrity:

When you're a celebrity, you tell the world.

When you're a star, the world will tell you.

Sincerely:

Golf "I'm Just a Gas Giant Myself" Widow

Tags: blog

drinking: diet fresca with about fifty ice-orby thingies in it. i'm dying of thirst
listening to: Pat Benatar, Wuthering Heights (live - Kate Bush cover)
whirley-popped corn: the reason i'm dying of thirst