Disclaimer

If a dog doesn't like the smell of another dog's mark on a tree he thinks of as "his", he either marks over it or he finds another tree. He doesn't set the tree on fire or get a bunch of other dogs to attack the original dog.

I wish I didn't have to have rules, but we're more evolved than dogs, aren't we?

(Hey, consider yourself lucky. Imagine if you thought you were within your rights and I just deleted your opinion without any explanation. At least, this way, you have some clue as to whatever you might do to lose the privilege of speaking your piece here.)

Rule one: "I equate the web to being in rush hour traffic. Everyone is really bold inside their box and they're just giving the finger out the window."
— Adam Savage, Mythbusters

Maybe so, but on my little patch of the information highway, you will get a ticket for pissing off the cops. Don't like it? Get off at the next exit and find a new route.

I only accept messages that don't upset me. If you can't say nothin' nice, don't say nothin' at all. You will be deleted. If you want to attack me in my comments, and I delete your messages and/or block your IP, you're being warned now: I claim immunity right here.

Also, if I've had upsetting encounters with you previously, and you now choose to send me another message, I'm going to delete you again, no matter how harmless or charming you choose to be this time round. I don't have the patience for it anymore. Piss me off once and you've lost the right to leave me messages. Groveling will be given the attention it deserves: a sincere grovel will be considered; a disingenuous one will be ridiculed publicly.

Also, to paraphrase the Humanity Critic, I only have one purpose for comments of the "I'm a dumbass who thinks my randomly saying 'your blog stinks' makes me less of a pussy" variety, and that purpose is that I genuinely enjoy poking fun at ignorant people.

Rule two: Don't try to debate with me or anyone else in my comments. If I invite comment within my diary, I'm more likely looking for entertaining fodder for my next entry than for a serious debate. Send me a constructive message and I'll be happy to consider it for pimping within my diary. I won't be using my comments — or yours — for that purpose any longer. I'm not getting into it with you.

I've seen it before.

1. Person A writes something in his/her diary
2. Person B starts debate
3. Person A thinks debate is interesting and attempts to continue it intelligently
4. Person B doesn't want to debate and starts whining.

I'm not going to delete debating entries; I'll leave them there. But you'd better think really carefully about whether or not you really want to debate, or if you just want everyone to agree with you. You and anyone who care to debate may do so, but not here. Take it back to your own forums.

And if you try to get me into the middle of it, I will be stressed out. Anything or anybody that stresses me out gets dumped.

Rule three: Identify yourself. In my world, you only have a voice if you choose to own what you have said. I despise cowards.

Rule four: I don't mind your signing, identifying yourself, and not providing a link because your diary is locked. If all you want to do is send a message or comment, I don't expect you to compromise your privacy. But for heaven's sake, don't give us a link to a password-protected diary. If you provide a link to a URL that my readers and I can't get into because it's password-protected, your entry will be deleted.

Rule five: You will notice that any writings contained in this diary that are not original are attributed to their original sources, including hyperlinks when the sources are online ones. You will further notice that I do not borrow others' works randomly; when I do so, I include with them my own perspective on the subject at hand.

If you want to borrow any of those thoughts, please refer back to the original sources, not this diary.

(If you borrow my original thoughts, then you should refer back to this diary.)

If you borrow anyone's thoughts and don't refer back to the source, consider this:

Journaling is meant to be an exercise to improve one's writing and examine onesself. When you plagiarize in your journal, you are copying someone else's writing and others' examinations of themselves. It does nothing to serve you.

Rule six: Spammers are absolutely welcome, with provisions — I charge rent. You can advertise anything you like, just not for free. If you don't pay the rent, you're evicted. I'm only a nice landlady (and lovey-dovey, with apologies to George Thorogood) if you give me money. Get in touch with me and I'll let you know my rates. (Yes, I'm totally for sale like that.)

If you don't care to abide by the above rules but still wish to speak your piece, that is what your own blog is for. I am not obligated to provide a soapbox for anyone.

Just remember this: I try never to actually tell anyone that I'm not about their opinions, but if I hear myself thinking, "Oh, shut UP" more than once when being pontificated at, I don't invest any more time in the exchange of ideas. You express yours, I'll have mine, and they're just going to have to remain separate but equal.

If you can't live with that, or if something I've written upsets you to the point where you feel you must start a flame war or die trying, click here:

If you'd like to send me an email, you may do so from here.